The Cupid Post

Online Dating - 11 Reasons To Go Online For Love

Where do you go when you are looking for love?
Are you considering joining an online dating site but not sure, if it is right for you?
Yes, you are on the right track. I firmly believe that online dating fits in with our modern day lifestyles.
A couple of years ago online dating still had a stigma linked to it. Though people were using the Internet as a method of dating, they did not talk about it with their friends or colleagues, for fear of coming across as desperate. You can realize that online dating is meant for those who are simply tired of meeting time wasters, who were not at all interested in committing to a relationship.
If you are not convinced online dating is for you, here are 11 reasons why I think online dating has its advantages over regular dating.

1. You do not have to hang around until the weekend to meet someone.
2. You do not have to get dressed up for a great night “online”. Put on whatever you feel comfortable in at home.
3. If you work unusual hours, online dating fits in greatly with your schedule. You can log on at any time of the day or night to suit you; there is constantly someone online waiting to chat.
4. If you start chatting to someone and then make up your mind that they are not what you are looking for, put them back in the net gently and go after another. There is a bounty of fish in the sea!
5. If you are worn-out of seeing the same old faces when you go out, there are people of all age groups all over the country waiting online to meet someone.
6. If you are a newcomer to an area, online dating is a great way of meeting people irrespective of whether it is for friendship or dating. If you come across a few people online in your area, you can organize a get together for you all, rather than meeting on a one-on-one basis.
7. If all of your friends have settled down, or you have newly become single, what better way to meet  someone new fast than to go online and meet more singles like yourself!
8. Anonymous messaging and chat rooms allow you to flirt to your heart’s content without any discomfiture or getting tongue-tied.
9. You will probably discover more about someone online before you arrange a date with them, than you would if you had met them in a bar. Online dating usually makes people more vigilant about who they choose to date, and that cannot be a bad thing!
10. We now live and date  in a very different way in comparison to previous generations where the conventional place to meet people was in nightclubs, parties, at work, or through friends. By joining an online dating site, you are not excluding these avenues, but merely extending your opportunities of meeting someone.
11. Lastly, 1 month’s membership costs less than a night out, and gives you hundreds of opportunities to meet your perfect partner – every night!

With so many optimistic reasons to go online for love, finding your perfect partner has never been easier. Try it out for yourself!

How To Go From An Online Conversation to the Phone

Learn How To Flirt

Flirting is a necessity to give that special somebody a hint that you are into them.  If you do not what flirting is then you should be aware that it is simply anything that you do to try and either get someones attention, or tell someone that you like them.  Here we will go over how exactly you are supposed to flirt.  That way you will not end up giving that certain somebody mixed messages, and can get your point across.

Flirting for women and men can be different in a number of ways.  A lot of flirting methods that men use, women will not be able to get away with, or if they do they will end up looking like they are easy, or insane.  For example,  if a woman went up to a man and said, hey there big daddy if I told you your body was bangin’ would you hold it against me?  They would be considered easy, or just plain weird.  However, if a man said that to a woman most would just write it off as a cheesy pick up line.  So there is particular etiquette that both men and women should follow.

For all the women out there, you need to come across as approachable.  That means you cannot have your nose in the air, and a stick up your butt.  When it comes to men though, you need to seem masculine, but not disgusting, so yes that means no burping.

The first step to flirting is eye contact, followed by a smile.  Now this too can get you  into trouble as you may look strange if you are starring too hard at them, and they may just think you are creepy.  Just a short glance will be fine, but you will need to do it a couple of times to get the point across.  Try to make it as sexy of a look as possible.

The smile needs to be cute, not dominating, and it really seals the deal.  Yeah we all look around, but do we all look,look again, and smile, not unless we have a motive. A smile is just an overall good thing to practice, as it lessens your chance at frowning wrinkles, and makes you come across as a pleasant and happy person.

The neck is a very flirtatious area, especially on a woman.  Ladies if you are trying to get a guys attention, show a little neck.  There area many ways you can work this in, and if you cannot come up with anything the classic hair toss will definitely do the trick.

Really any gussying up will give someone the hint you are into them.  For example, straightening your clothes, fixing your hair, or applying lip gloss can give onlookers the idea that you are trying to impress someone.  Pair this up with a stare and a smile, and you are flirting, congratulations.

Speaking of lip gloss, red lipstick always does the trick to show someone you are trying to impress.  Lips are a flirtatious area on your body, so glossing them up, or applying a red color to them only seals the deal.  Any lip gestures work, so men do not feel left out if you are not big on the gloss idea, try biting your lip, or licking them and it should have the same effect.

A few other flirting tips that you may want to try out next time you spot a prospective partner are, crossing your legs,sorry guys this one only works for women, well unless you are gay, which then you are welcome to give it a try.  Making your shoulders appear squared, sorry ladies this only works for men no matter who you are attracted to.  It gives the impression that you are buff, and masculine.

So there you go, everything you need to learn how to flirt.  The rest is up to you, so go out there and give it a try.

How To Find The Perfect Match

Perfection is impossible right?  Wrong!  So many people believe that they have to settle for second best, or even third, and that goes for relationships too.  This is because we do not think  we could ever achieve perfection, but what if we could?  Well now you can.  Here we will go over everything you need to know on how to achieve perfection in your match.  Online dating is great for finding the perfect match because most of the people that sign up for those sites are trying to find someone they are compatible with.  What makes it even better is that they can match you on different levels of compatibility to ensure that you are on the right track.

What needs to change is our mindsets that we will never get everything we want in life.  So often when we go on a date, we get all dressed up to try and impress the other person.  However, should they not be trying to impress us.  Dates are simply a way of weening out all the people we cannot find a connection with, and they should like us because we are compatible, not because of our Gucci sunglasses.  We do this to feel like we are in control, but really we are not.  We cannot make people like us, they will either like us or not.  On your next date try to focus on yourself, and if you think this person is a good match for you, not vice versa.

Some people date out of fear that they will be alone forever, and they let their standards decrease until they end up with some fat, poor, smelly man that just lays around all day.  You think that you are being too picky, and perhaps that is why you are still single, but really you are just impatient.  Be up front with your expectations, and if they do not like them then tell them to get lost.  If they are that scared of your expectations, perhaps they are afraid of commitment.

Make your goal of meeting someone as serious as possible.  Do not settle for anything then hwat you expect from your partner.  Be clear, and communicate these things early on so that you are not wasting your time with someone who is not the perfect match for you.  That way, when you do find the perfect match, you can be happy with the decision you made in life instead of second guessing, or even worse, cheating on your partner.  Do not let your life be filled with, what-if, or should have, because before you know it, it will be too late to turn back.  Whoever said that perfection was impossible, obviously settle for something less, right?

Why Your Online Relationship May Not Work

You have decided to venture into the world of online dating.  You have never tried anything like this before, but you are at your wits end, and refuse to spend another Friday night alone with your cat, and the newest chick flick.  You are thinking to yourself, hopefully I meet someone on here that can help me change my life, make it more exciting, and fun.  Well, before you log on, take an opportunity to evaluate whether or not you are serious about online dating.

You see many people when using online dating, are very cautious, and usually they will never let the relationship blossom into something ‘normal’.  The lenses we look at online dating through can make it difficult for an online relationship to be successful, find out if you are one of these people.

First, how seriously do you take the people you are talking to?  Do you find your self unsure of what they are saying.  Do you think they are lieing, or exaggerating their stories.  If you do not take the people online seriously, then how will you ever take a relationship with one of them?

Second, how much information do you provide to your online dates.  Are you shy and reserved when normally you would be open with someone face to face.  If you are not willing to provide a few things about yourself then what makes you think people will want to date you online.

Third, trust is a very important part of online relationships.  Because you are both so far away, there needs to be a very solid trust foundation to take away some of the fear that they are not who they say they are.

Fourth, shyness can be cute, but it can also be annoying.  You have no reason to be shy with people online, because at least they are not there to judge you.  Now of course do not go from super outgoing to super shy when you meet face to face, because then you just look like two different people.

Fifth, do not be afraid.  Fear is not a good way to start a relationship.  Try not to be afraid of what might happen, and just go with it, as you would if you met that person in person.  People will be able to sense your paranoia, and may get turned off by it.  Be safe, but try to relax.

Sixth, believe in who you are with.  If your partner senses that you do not believe in this relationship, or put it at a lower standing then a ‘normal’ relationship then you may find yourself alone.

Seventh, what are your priorities in life?  How do your priorities come across online?   People like to know that they are appreciated, and play a role in their partners life.  That is why it is important to make it clear to your online partner that they matter in your life.

Eighth, are you willing to take the next step?  Talking is only one part of online dating, and if you simply leave it at that you are no more then friends.  Once you have overcome talking online, try talking on the phone, and then after you are comfortable, perhaps you want to meet somewhere for a coffee, and talk face to face.  Then you can proceed to touching, and even more intimate behaviours.

Ninth, be genuine, and sincere.  If you want this erelationship to last then you should try to be yourself, but also keep it at a high level of sincerity.  Even if it is just online dating it could lead to something more, but not if you are not willing to show people the best side of you.

Finally, online dating sites are not grocery stores, where you can pick and choose what you want, and return it if it is not what you were looking for.  Do not treat people online like they are 100% disposable.  If you lose someone you really liked then you may not be able to get them back, so be careful, and keep your heart open.

How To Have A Better Relationship Then Your Parents Did

So often we blame our parents for the way we turn out.  If they fought a lot then it seems we are destined to do the same thing with our spouses.  However, this is not the way you should be thinking of your relationship with your partner.  Instead you should be trying to overcome the predisposed acts of your parents.  You have been given a gift that they were not, and you are able to see exactly what you should not do.  Now of course, this only goes for the things you view as negative actions in your relationship, that have been a result of your parents actions.  The good things should be ignored.  Like they say, if it is not broken then do not fix it.

First, you should take your parents examples, as what not to do in your relationships.  If your parents did not set good examples in their own relationships, then you should not follow their leads.  Perhaps they did not know what they were imposing on you, but treat it as a guide to overcome the odds, and make a decision to try and refrain form acting the way they did.

Secondly, now that you have gotten rid of the bad influences, try and find a good role model to look up to in your relationship.  Perhaps you have noticed how your friends and his girlfriend never fight, and they always seem to communicate if things are not right.  Well you should talk to your friend and ask them how they do it so that you can try it with your girlfriend.  A lot of people will get jealous at the way other people handle their problems that they lose the advice from it.  Do not be envious of other couples, learn from them.

Third, you may want to think about getting some counselling.  If you know you are headed down the wrong path, you should ask for help.  Do not be afraid to admit when things are going wrong, and perhaps you could even ask your parents what they think went wrong with their relationship.  You can be sure that if they both point fingers at each other, they are both in the wrong.  You have a choice to either go to counselling alone, or try to get your partner to come as well.  If they will not go to counselling, then at least you  know that you tried.

Finally, you need to relax.  People get way to stressed out about relationship, when really they are supposed to fun, exciting, and enjoyable.  When you put too much pressure on each other, and freak out if things do not go as planned then you will have a hard time feeling satisfied about your relationship.  SO next time you are having problems, take a deep breath, and relax.

Sometimes The Truth Hurts

We have all been there at one point in our lives.  We are madly in love with someone, but cannot tell just how much they love us back.  Love can blind us all, and make us think and feel things that are not really there.  It is a good idea to try and evaluate if the person you are in love with really loves you back, or if they are just playing you for a fool.  Here we will go over a few warning signs hat you are being led on, and that way you will be equipped with the tools you need to tell if you are being played.

Scenario 1

So you have just started dating a new partner, and to your surprise you see that your partner still has their profile on online dating sites, and it is set at single.  This is a classic sign that your partner has not made a commitment to be with you exclusively, and is obviously seeing other people.  I would confront hem, and see what they say.  If they act surprised give them another chance, but if not then let them casually date… someone else.

Scenario 2

You have been dating someone online for quite awhile, but every time you bring up the idea of meeting they always suggest somewhere far away from where they live.  What is most likely going on in this situation is they have a spouse, or a really dirty house.  I would confront them, and ask them why they never suggest meeting closer to where they live.  You should be able to tell if they are lying just from looking at them, and hearing how they respond.

Scenario 3

You have met someone online, and have been talking to them for awhile now.  They are always telling you that they have such a great job, and a nice expensive car, but every time you see them they are taking the bus, and their car is in the shop.  The story just does not add up, and they seem to good to be true.  Again, I would confront them, and ask if they were lying about their job, or their car.  There is no point in starting a relationship based on a lie.

Scenario 4

You have been dating someone online for a couple months.  However, you have never met in person.  They tell you that they really want to meet, but cannot afford to fly out to meet you.  So you tell them that you will pay for it, and wire them the money.  This is a well known scam, and and men are usually the targets.  You will most likely never hear from this person again, so keep your money in your wallet.

Scenario 5

You have only been taking to this person online for a few days, and already they want to hear that you are committed to them.  You feel like thing s are moving too fast.  Be careful of this situation.  This is a classic sign that you are being manipulated by someone who is controlling, and perhaps even abusive.

How To Tell Someone They Are A Bad Kisser

So we will set the scene.  You just started dating this guy, and it has been about a month now.  You have not jumped into bed with each other yet, but you have gone far enough.  However, the thought of kissing him makes even your dog sick.  He is an awful kisser, and by awful, I mean he does not have a clue what he is doing.  Perhaps he missed the pillow or hand lessen hat we all learn in school, or maybe some stupid women told him what a great kisser he was… when they were five, and now he is dead set that there is nothing wrong.

This is actually a much more common issue then you may think. Many women simply hate the way their boyfriends kiss.  Either it is too much, or not enough, too wet or too dry, to much tongue or not enough.  Now of course we all have our differences, and we are entitled to our own opinions, but how do you tell him that you would rather kiss your grampa?

Well do not worry, we are here to help.  After you take my advice, and get the issue out in the open you can have many more months of fabulous kissing.

First, you have to be honest.  Now I do not mean tell him that you hate the way he kisses, no you will have to be a little more subtle then that.  You should tell him that you read in cosmo this month a whole bunch of new kissing moves that you really want to try.  Ask him if he would be willing to let you practice on him, or if he wants to try a few.  When he says yes, simply teach him how to kiss the way you want him to.  This is more of a sensitive route at telling him he cannot kiss.  Now you must make it a lesson, so switch up your techniques every once and a while.  Say, this is the slow version, and this is the fast one, or say they recommend that you keep your mouth closed slightly, or open more, whichever he cannot seem to do.  I always say the better you kiss, the better they will.  Make your kisses soft, and so will they.

If they fall back into their old habits, simply say, hey do not forget our lesson, or nope that is not the way cosmo said to do it.  Once they get turned on by the make out session then you will be well on your way to kissing bliss.  It can be a fun exercise for the both of you, and it is worth it if you really like the guy.

Now that you have the advice, the rest is up to you.  Go and give it a try, and you will be on your way to a more romantic, and skilled kisser in no time.  Your lips will thank me.

Breakup Warning Signs: Address Them Before It Is Too Late

We have all been there at one point in our lives.  You just finish a nice dinner with your partner, and then next thing you know you are crying in your apartment with a gallon of ice-cream.   You did not even see the break-up coming.  Everything was fine until after dinner… Or was it?

Break-ups do not just happen overnight.  They take time and thought, especially if you are in a real relationship, and not something casual.  You may feel like it was the most unexpected thing in the world, but most likely it was not.  Usually there are a number of break-up warning signs to look for before the event takes place.  Perhaps you were so blinded by love that they passed you by without you even noticing them.  Well, listen to these warning signs, and you can see for yourself.

First, you need to look for changes in behavior with your partner.  Did their work hours suddenly change?  Does this change effect the amount of time you get to spend together?  When you ask them why they changed their schedule, what kind of response do you get?  Is it sincere?  Most people can tell when they are being avoided, but sometimes we would rather not listen to our conscious mind in a hope to out wit it, and make ourselves think everything is okay.  Now this is not to say that everyone who changes their hours is going to break-up with you, but it is something to think about, when it is out of character for that person.

Second, is your partner forgetting to do those things they promised, or have a hard time keeping plans with you?  I mean when you first got together they probably would have moved mountains for you, and that does fade, but is it constantly happening.  Do you feel like you cannot remember the last time they followed through on their plans with you?  That is a key warning sign to look out for.

Thirdly, did your partner forget about your birthday, or your anniversary?  I know I know, what man remembers an anniversary.  Well I will leave that one up to ou.  Have they never forgotten until now.  What did hey do to make it up to you?  If they are genuinely upset with themselves I would not worry too much, but if it is reoccurring, and they do not care, something is up.

Fourth, have they stopped communicating with you?  Have they become distracted by something, and are less willing to talk about things that are going on with their family and work lives. Do you find it difficult to have a good conversation with them?  Communication is the most important thing in a relationship, and therefore if you cannot talk about your lives then what is the point to being in a relationship.  Now of course, the conversation will be limited at ties, but when it becomes non-existent you need help.

Fifth, how is your relationship when it comes to affection?  Do you show more, less, or the same amount of affection as you did when you started dating?  Most likely, you are showing less, but has that amount changed in the last little while, or has it stayed relatively the same?  Do they suddenly not kiss you in public, or hold your hand at the movies.  Have they always rubbed your back at night, and now they just roll over and go straight to bed?  These are the signs you should be looking out for.

Sixth, has your partner stopped asking yo about your life?  Do they not care about how your day at work was, or if you had a good time at the birthday party you went to?  When we are getting ready to breakup with someone, we feel the need to detach them from our lives.  By not allowing ourselves to care about what the other person did today.  It is kind of like ‘out of sight, out of mind’.

Seven, have you caught them in a lie when up until now they have been honest and truthful?  Do you feel like the trust you had in your relationship is gone.  Once the trust in a relationship is gone, it can be very difficult to get back.  In fact, you may be too late to try and rekindle a loving relationship at that point.  You can also be quite sure that any attempt at fixing it is useless, as you see that person as  a liar, and it sounds like they have made up their mind already about the relationship, if they are going to lie to you.

Eighth, are they suddenly being secretive about everything?  From emails to phone conversations, do you feel like they are hiding something form you?  Have they locked their phones, and email accounts, or changed a password?  These are surefire break-up signs, as they do not want you to know something about them that at one point you did.

Finally, have you found that recently you and your partner have been fighting a lot more often?  Do you fight oer even the smallest of issues?  I mean we all go through hard times, but have these hard times turned into more of a regularity?  This can be the make it or break it point, as they may just be finding an excuse to break-up.

As I said, a lot of these signs could just be your day to day activity.  The key here is changes in your behavior, and over a shorter term.  If you have noticed one or more of these signs recently then you need to address the issue.  Tell your partner straight out if you feel like this may be the end.  Tell them that you have noticed a few changes, and you do not want to make a big deal about it, but you do not want the relationship to end.  If you have a chance at saving the relationship, it will only happen if you do something to stop it.  For some couples it may be too late.  Too many things have happened, and too many things have been said to try and change the inevitable, but for others you just needed to open your eyes a bit.

Mistakes That New Online Daters Make

Online dating can be very different in some ways then your average face to face dating.  It is the same as poker.  They are two very different games if you play online versus, at the casino.  So, how do you know what to do if you are new to the online dating world?  Well do not worry, you can find out all the do’s and dont’s of first timer online dating right here.

Technology is making it so much easier for all of us to connect.  With that we have witnessed a shift, where people just do not have time to do things the old fashioned way. In that I mean that they would much rather find a soul mate then waste their time and money going on endless dates, after being set up by your friends, and even your parents.  This leads me to my first point, that online daters need to seriously think about what they want out of their online dating experience.  Of course a lot of daters experience this, but it is more apparent in online dating.  You see it through people with hurt feelings, practical jokes, and wasting another members time.  Take a minute to seriously consider what you are looking for in your relationships online.

The next advice is that you should not carry on a virtual relationship for more then a couple of months without meeting.  People can get really connected to someone online, even though they are halfway around the world.  That is why it is important to meet sooner then later because then you will not feel so vulnerable.  You see online daters rely on giving out a lot of personal information about their lives to strangers.  They remain strangers until they met face to face.  Over time you come up with who that person is online, and then you meet, and they are nothing like that in real life.  Do not let yourself get your heart broken, because you did not meet sooner.

The next big mistake is the opposite of the previous one.  You cannot rush into meeting a online date.  If you do not leave anytime to connect online then you are simply going on another blind date, and you can do that in the real world.  What if you have nothing in common, and therefore nothing to talk about.  Even to just sit down for a coffee you need to feel comfortable, and blind dates have never been considered comfortable.  What if he tells you that he collects naval lint?  Don’t you think it would have been a lot easier to find out about his fascination with belly button lint long before you met for a cup of coffee?

That brings us to lesson number four.  Set goals for your online experience.  If you want to meet a life partner, then set a goal to do just that.  Make sure that they have the same thing in mind.  Pay attention to your gut feelings, and when you feel comfortable enough to go out for a drink then do just that.  Now of course if they do not live in the same area then you may need a little more time to connect online a little longer, to get over that initial scary airport meeting.

Dating is just as serious online, as it is in real life.  If you think anything other then this then you are not in it for the right reasons.  There are specific sites where you can go depending on what you are looking for online.  If you are looking for something casual then do not waste t he time of the serious daters, and go to a site where casual encounters is what the members goals are.