What To Talk About On A First Date
Dating someone new is exciting but can cause anxiety for that first date. If you are set for a date this weekend sometimes your biggest worry is what you will talk about. Before your date a usual chat with a good friend reassures you not to worry about the date and that it will go fine but how do they know?! You may be shy or when it comes to dating you get all flustered and have no idea where to begin.
Conversation that begins easily and flows well can come with some easy tips to remember on your first date for either person. Just remember this is a date and not an interview. I have met people who shared they actually bring their questions not so cleverly hidden into their daily agenda planners. Not so subtle when you’ve got it sitting open in front of you at the date ticking the questions off as you ask them. I’ve also come across people who say they ask the questions over the telephone wanting to avoid bringing it along on their dates but guess what, people aren’t stupid. They are onto you. It’s a big turnoff even before the date has begun.
Stay clear of personal questions and topics over dinner. These would include asking what happened in their last relationship that went wrong. It’s hard to believe that so many people ask these questions right off the bat and then amazes me how much men and women get upset by hearing too much information. Remember if you ask such questions this opens the door that your date can talk about anything and plainly some of it is none of our business.
Being on the subject of past relationships, it is also not wise to openly talk about your last ex or who you just finished sleeping with. This makes me choke on my wine when men start talking about how crazy their last ex was and what she did without me ever asking. Most of the time people don’t want to hear about the last love of your life or play date. Have respect for the person you are out on a date with and place yourself in their shoes. If there are things you wouldn’t want to hear, why would you talk about it.
Don’t bring up sensitive subjects such as religion or politics. Just because you love discussing politics with your co-workers it doesn’t mean your date wants this relaxing evening turning into a political debate. There is a time and place and the first date it is not. Some people worry that they don’t know enough about politics and are nervous if someone brings it up. These days we live in a world where religion is a very touchy subject. Some people have their own religion that they follow and some don’t believe in it. You have to approach that subject when the time comes but the first date should be light and fun.
We spend most of our day at work so don’t re-hash how much your boss pissed you off this week. Work is work. Leave it there. It’s great to find out what each other’s careers are but too much talk can be a sign that someone is a workaholic.
All in all both of you have taken the time to spend this time together getting to know each other. Don’t panic if there is silence. It sounds cliché but just be yourself. First dates are exciting and remember that both of you are hoping that conversation will flow.
Who Is Looking For Love Online?
So you are thinking about venturing into the world of online dating, but you do not want anyone more creepy then the guys you are finding in the real world already. You are thinking to yourself, if I cannot find a man here and now, what makes me think I can find any takers online? Well you may be wrong about the people that are looking for love online. You may be surprised at the statistics we will go over about who exactly is online right now, and why they have decided to start online dating.
First, when men were asked online about what they are looking for out of the online dating experience, a whopping 98% of men said they were looking for a long term relationship. So that myth that men are online preying for younger women to take advantage of is really a myth. That means for all you ladies out their, do not have this idea in your mind when looking for love online. It is simply not fair for the men online that are looking for a serious long term relationship.
When men were tallied online, 94% of them said they are ready to settle down, and balance their careers with a successful relationship. I bet you never thought you would hear those words in the same sentence. That means for all you women that thought men would never be willing to settle down then you are wrong. Men obviously do think about the long term, and the success of their careers, and relationships.
So how are you doing so far? Surprised at who is online looking for love? Well get prepared to be surprised some more. When a group of men were surveyed online about what they are looking for when participating in online dating, a whopping 87% said they find it attractive if a women makes more money then them. So far, it looks like the men online, are all the great guys that are virtually non-existent here on earth.
The next question was about what men do in their spare time. When they were asked about charitable donations, and volunteer work, 80% of men said they have given money to a charity, and a third of them also volunteer in their spare time. This is something that really lets you know what type of guy is online right now, and so far our stereotypes have been over turned.
How about what kind of women these men are looking for? When asked what the most important trait they are looking for in women the top answer was ‘kindness’, and 75% said their partners would be their best friends. So there you have it, men are not all pigs. In fact, they are not superficial at all. There is nothing superficial about kindness. What did you think their response would have been? My guess was a toss between breasts or butts.
A few more little stats that you should be aware of when wondering what kind of men are lurking online are, that almost 60% them have been cheated on. When asked if they believe in love at first sight, almost 60% replied yes.
Last but not least, and listen closely ladies, when asked about how they feel about sex on the first date, 60% of men said it is great by all means, but they would not marry someone that did that.
What To Wear On A First Date
The countdown to a first date is fun, new and exciting. It can also cause butterflies if you’re anxious about where you will be going and not sure what to expect. Dating in itself is always the unknown with a new person.
You’ve got that date next weekend and still not sure if that black dress is going to work that’s in your closet. It’s always important for the person who is taking you out to give you an idea on where you will be going. Did you hear that men? There are men that I have encountered who play mysterious until that eventful date and cause either an overdressed or under dressed situation. Both not good if you’re interested in a second date. If you’re telling her you’re going to something low-key that can be a different explanation to someone else who may sport a pair of jeans and a tee when in fact you’re going to a nice theater and then out for some wine tasting. You see what I mean don’t you.
Ideally he should call you in the week to confirm the time for your date especially if he’s picking you up. This is a good time to ask him where you two may be going. Some men are so laid back they have quite a few ideas which may prove challenging for you to plan your outfit. If the idea is dinner and maybe dancing or shooting pool somewhere, you can always wear a shorter heel if you will be playing pool.
Choose something outfit appropriate for the date planned. Don’t wear your black dress if it’s a casual lunch and a walk through the local park garden. Only wear the heels if you can wear them. If you are not accustomed to wearing 3 inch heels it will show in your stumble. If you do plan to wear heels make sure to wear broken in shoes and not a brand new pair the night of. There is nothing worse than limping in a blood filled shoe because your heels are blistering!
Do dress appropriately for the weather. If it’s raining that day don’t wear a light colored outfit since you don’t know how far from the parking lot to the restaurant you will be going. With cars driving and splashing around you don’t want your pretty outfit ruined. If you tend to use hair products like hairspary and it is raining with no umbrella, be prepared for those products to make a sticky mess in your hair.
Don’t try that new haircut or hairstyle an hour before your actual date. If you were planning to try out a new hairstyle do a test style a week before the date just to ensure you actually like it. If make up is not really part of your daily routine you don’t need to go all out. An eyelash curler, mascara and a pretty shade of lipstick that compliments your skin tone works. Less is always better when it comes to makeup anyways.
Do dress in what you are comfortable with. If you are a girly girl of course you love to dress up and be feminine but if you are a sporty girl putting a dress on may not be the most fun thing for you do. Compromise to leave that track suit at home on the nite of the date and wear black slacks or even a cute pair of jeans depending on where you will be going. If you’re uncomfortable in what you are wearing it will show in your body language. Be confident in what you choose and just be yourself.
Online Dating For Seniors
A large amount of the older generation know how to navigate their way around the internet and many want to learn. There are many who are interested in learning how to use the computer and finding their way online. If you notice there are many local classes these days geared towards seniors and technology.
There are many seniors who are retired, widowed and single who are just as interested in meeting someone new to share their years with. Online dating is not just for the college student and young professionals. Meeting someone locally can be proven difficult if your social activities are limited.
Before you begin make sure to do your research on which dating site you would like to use. There are now dating sites that cater towards seniors meeting other seniors. Always use a reputable online dating site and be sure to read their testimonials.
When you end up signing up for the dating site of your choice you will need to come up with a username. Make sure it is one that is safe without revealing personal information about you. Don’t use your actual name, address or anything that is revealing. In this day and age you have to be extra careful on what you reveal online for you really don’t know who is on the other side of the computer screen.
Make sure to fill out your profile and be genuine with your interests, hobbies and goals. If there is nothing written it will not capture anyone’s attention. If there is too little with no thought given to what was written again it won’t capture an interest. Be honest about what you are looking for on your profile. There is always a section if you are just looking to make new friends or a serious relationship.
Use a current photo and not one that is from a decade ago. Surprisingly many online dating users young and old many use a photo that is out of date and people do change physically in ten years. Being honest about what you look like and what you are about is key.
Be cautious when you are exchanging messages with someone and do not reveal any private information. There are some people who do lie in their profiles and are there to purposely mislead online dating users. If there is someone who is being inappropriate you can always report them online or block that person.
Online dating is a great way to meet new people in your local area from the comfort of your home. Tread with safety and if you make a connection with someone online make sure to meet in a very public place separately.
Dating Horoscopes
If you love horoscopes then you will enjoy my take on your sign. Find out what is in store for you in the love department.
ARIES-March 21st - April 20th
Aries is a fire sign, so get your hose. Aries are bold, and impatient people. This means they are not going to wait around for you. Aries are leaders, and they can be impulsive. They can be selfish and jealous at times. If you are trying to date an Aries man then be willing to give up your initiative. Aries men usually go for intelligent and exciting women. If you are chasing an Aries woman then get ready to be her security guard, and she loves to be catered to.
TAURUS-Apr 21st - May 21st
Taurus’ are stubborn, and will not budge for anything. This does not leave you feeling out of control though, and you are always grounded in your decision making. If you are wanting to date a Taurus man then get ready for his bullheadedness, but someone that will always be there for you. If you are after a Taurus woman then you will find her to be sensual, and a romantic at heart. She will love physical affection. You may find her to be a little high maintenance.
GEMINI-May 22nd - June 22nd
Geminis are outgoing and tend to be flirty. Gemini’s are very flexible, and laid back. Because they are so creative they make excellent inventors. This is easy for them because they are extremely intelligent. If you are going after a Gemini man, then be careful because they have a hard time deciding things. They are usually torn between two different decisions, or women for that matter. If you are looking to date a Gemini woman then be ready to have intriguing conversations, and even a little bit of debating.
CANCER-June 23rd - July 23rd
Cancer’s are very emotional people.They tend to be family orientated, and therefore are close to their friends. No matter what sex you are chasing after get ready to stay at home. Cancers love to stick close to their nests, and are very relaxed. They would prefer this over going out. However, if you are dating a Cancer woman then be prepared as she will be moody. She can be quite intense at times as well.
LEO-July 24th - August 23rd
Leo’s are cowardly at times, but impulsive at others. They are very dramatic people, and therefore would make good actors. If you are thinking about dating a leo woman then she will always want to be the centre of your attention. They are very happy people though so you will enjoy having them around. As for the men, you can be quite vain at times so open your eyes to everything around you. You are not the center of the universe.
VIRGO-August 24th - September 23rd
Virgo’s are very organized people, and make practical decisions. Their minds work analytically, and this makes them quite intelligent people. If you are dating a Virgo woman then be careful because they tend to put everyone else in front of themselves. If you are interested in a Virgo man then watch out because they feel the need to be perfect at tall times.
LIBRA-September 24th - October 23rd
Libras love being in love. They are very artistic, and creative individuals. They love the arts, and are very particular. As for Libra women, they are too easy to forgive. you can walk all over them, and they will still forgive you. The men on the other hand are really good at hiding their true feelings.
SCORPIO-October 24th - November 22nd
Scorpio’s are very intense people, and their emotions sometimes get in the way of things. Scorpio’s tend to twist things, and take things the wrong way so be careful with both sexes for this trait. As for the ladies, be careful as they do not forgive easily. If you cheat consider yourself lucky if she ever looks at you again. The men are mysterious, and have a yearning for an emotional bond with someone. If you hurt them, they will sting you.
SAGITTARIUS
Sagittarius’ are driven by their impulsiveness, and curiosity. They hate routines, and have an intense need for change all the time. They get bored easy, and love to travel. If you are going to date a Sagittarius girl, take her somewhere new, and try to expose her to a number of different things. If you are dating a Sagittarius guy then be aware that they need to know the truth about everything. If they do not get it, then they will find it on their own.
CAPRICORN-December 23rd - January 19th
Capricorns are very motivated people, and like to get things done. They are not big on taking risks, and are practical people. If you are dating a Capricorn man then be ready to be second when it comes to his career. Capricorns are extremely ambitious people, and like to get recognition for things they have achieved. If you are going to date a Capricorn woman then be forewarned that she will be quite traditional.
AQUARIUS-January 20th - February 19th
Aquarius’ are intelligent, and quick minded. They are innovators, and like to make things easier then they have to be. The men are rebellious, so they need to have people around them at all times. As for the ladies, they are hard to connect with. They have a lot of friends, but tend not to get too close to them.
PISCES-February 20th - March 20th
Pisces love the water, and would live at sea if they could. They are open-hearted, and have an amazing intuition. If you are going to date a Pisces man be careful, because they tend to use their instinct rather then facts so arguing with them is pointless. However, they try and escape from arguments so that helps. As for the women, they are very eager to forgive people, despite what has been done to them.
How To Bounce Back After A Breakup
Your relationship ends and it feels like you’re never going to stop crying and you can’t pull yourself together. It’s definitely okay to feel the pain and if you need to spend the next few days under your covers sobbing and screaming over the phone to a friend that he will regret it do it but DON’T stay there. Kick off those covers and make your move to bounce back.
Good friends are necessary here for your support. They are the ones who are there when things don’t work out and will reassure you that he is so not worth it. Make an all girls nite out plan and watch how laughter can certainly put you in a better mood even if for that nite. It will get easier as time goes along.
Talk about it. That’s what our friends are there for. Choose someone that is compassionate and understanding. Don’t vent out your hurt to someone who may not be the most sensitive.
Excercising can get that frustration and anger out. Try a new class that you’ve always wanted. Hot yoga, dance class and more. There are many options for you to try out and being healthy by eating right and treating our bodies well will put your mind in a better place. Feeling good on the inside and outside will help balance you.
Do not stay in contact with the ex who broke your heart. When you stay in contact directly after a break up most of us have hope that things will be rekindled and work out happily ever after. It prevents us from moving forward and by limiting contact with your ex will help you move forward maybe even faster.
Treat yourself to something you enjoy. If you love the spa and want to get a full body massage then treat yourself. It will help ease the stress we put onto our bodies and you’ll leave feeling calmer than when you walked in. Make sure to do something you enjoy and may not have gotten to do so when you were in your relationship.
Make sure to keep yourself busy. It’s okay to express your emotions. If you don’t like crying in front of your friends then have a cry fest in the privacy of your own home. Let it all out. Sob it out during your favourite I’m Going To Get Through songs. If we keep it in it makes our bodies more tense and one day it may just all come out when least expected.
In the moment it may seem like you will never get through it and the future seems bleak without him but in time you will look back and see that you got through it.
Conversation Starters: 10 Fun Questions You Can Ask Your Partner
Do you find it difficult to start a conversation when you are in a relationship. Is it hard to find something to talk about? Most people experience this either at the start of a relationship, or after a few years with each other. You will not only have fun, but you will get to know your partner on a deeper level. make your partner answer, but make sure you answer them too. Bring the conversation back into your relationship with these fun conversation starters.
1. What would you do if you knew you only had one day to live?
Of course you are not wishing death on anyone, but usually people would do some exciting and crazy things if they knew they only had a day to live. With this question you will find out what the other person values.
2. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
This is a great question to find out and plan a future vacation for the two of you. Perhaps you will figure out that you both want to travel to Alaska, or climb Mt. Kilimanjaro. This will bring you closer as a couple.
3. What would you do if you won the lottery?
With this question you will find out what your partner wants in life. Would they be frivolous with their money, or save it for the future. Maybe they will quit their job, or find an easier one. The more realistic the amount the more real of answer you will get. It is a fun question to play around with.
4. What is the most embarrassing think that has ever happened to you?
This question is not very important, but rather you should pay close attention to the answer. Can the person laugh about it in the end, or is it still effecting them. This will give you an idea about how they handle themselves in unflattering situations.
5. Who is your favorite actor, or actress?
This question is useless, but you will get a laugh out of it. Especially when you go to the movies together, and you can tease the person about the acting abilities of their favorites.
6. What is your favorite thing about me?
This question will give you a lot of insight about the other person, and how the feel about you. We all have good and bad qualities so try asking it in the vice versa situation, but if it is ething that will bother you then do not ask. Finding out your pet peeves early on in a relationship can be beneficial.
7. What do you remember about your first kiss?
Again if this is something you cannot listen to then do not ask, but likely this was a long time ago, and you can both have a laugh about it. This question can spark a romantic first kiss of your own.
8. When you were a child, what is something that you did that you never told your parents about?
Getting to know your partner is important, but if you have not known them for long then you will get a laugh about finding out their childhood stories. It will also give you an idea about what they hide, and what they share.
9. What is the weirdest dream you ever had?
Dreams are always interesting, so you will get a kick out of the answer. People can talk about their dreams for hours so you should be equipped with a conversation for a few hours at least.
10. What would you do if…?
Get creative, because this is your chance to find out somethings about each other that you need to know before getting serious. For example, what would you do if I made more money then you, or if you had to stay home with the children. These things are good questions to get out in the open, and the answers can surprise you.
He’s Just Not That Into You
The popular phrase that everyone laughs about even when you jokingly say it to the guy you are dating. You meet your girlfriends for lunch or dinner and the topic of dating always come up into conversation even without even drinks! It doesn’t matter if you are 14, 20, 30 and so forth. It will always be the same question you wonder about when you are dating someone new. Does he like me?
True story scenarios with tons of laughter from the table because when you’re asking it out loud explaining the situation it then seems too clear that hey he’s not that into you.
With some of my friends who are very particular on a man’s profession I myself like dating someone who at least loves what they are doing versus someone who appears miserable and complains about their work at all times. So I have dated business professionals, entreprenurs, computer geeks to club bouncers. Go figure that the latter ones always seemed to be happier except for one that I just recently met.
We went out for coffee and he could not stop talking about the ex-girlfriend which is always fun to hear. I meant that with sarcasm but I really wonder why men don’t get that the new date doesn’t really need to hear how awful she was. As women we don’t want to get a hint of what may be coming if we were to get into a relationship and split up. Personally I think I’ve only met one or two men in my whole lifetime of dating who did not speak about their ex-girlfriends. It was very refreshing! Maybe as women we are just more considerate and choose not to speak about
our ex lovers and all. Hmm.
Anyways, this club bouncer and I met up in the week for coffee. Here was the thing. I was introduced to him at the actual club so it was loud and noisy right. When I actually met him in person I actually could hear his voice now and it didn’t match the physial part of him. It was completely distracting to me in conversation to say the least. Totally threw me off for it was high pitched and he was all of 6′3″ displaying some good pipes. ha.
Anyways, I should have known from the get go from the coffee place he picked out for us which was pretty isolated and unknown. Well coffee is coffee and when it comes to my coffee I’m open. Instead of having an open conversation it turned into a one-sided conversation with him ranting about his ex-girlfriend who he split up with 5 years ago and how awful she was. It always makes me cringe for I don’t the woman or any of the exes I hear about so I know realistically there are always three sides to the story. The truth fits in between the two.
I figured this bouncer obviously needed some closure for all the anger he was throwing out into our coffee cups and I wasn’t the right person for it. He called me this afternoon and I had to tell him in the middle of his ex-talk that I had to get ready for a big party tonight which is true. It’s better to be honest with someone so I’ll be speaking to him tommorrow and letting go of this new guy and his ex-girlfriend. Oh well, c’est la vie!
The Best Vacation Ideas for Couples in Love
Everyday we go to work, day in and out. We go home kiss our spouses, and the kids, have a bite to eat, and go to bed. The next day we wake up and do it all over again. Over the years we become exhausted of this routine, and we need to look forward to something to keep us going. A vacation is the perfect thing for someone that is stuck in this routine. Not only will it make you happy, but it will liven you up. It will bring the spice back into your relationship. Now travelling with the kids is always fun, but it is in no way a vacation most of the time. You are still doing everything to keep them entertained. This vacation should be about you, and a reward for everything you do for each other. That is why you need to just say no to the kids, ship them off to your mother and law, and say scianara.
Here are the top vacation getaways for couples. To help you find what you may have lost over the last couple of years, while busy saving for college funds, and dance lessons. Give one a try for your next get away.
Obviously, a nice tropical climate has never hurt anyone. Especially, if you live somewhere cold. Anywhere in the Caribbean is a great choice. If there is one place that tops the rest it would have to be Barbados. There you can enjoy the beach, and the local entertainment. Let loose, and go dancing. Or relax on the sand with a drink that preferably has an umbrella in it. Tahiti is also a great choice for a warm, sunny spot. There is plenty of romance on this island, and many fun things to do together.
If that is not what you are looking for then why not try a romantic trip for two to the Pocono Mountains in Pennsylvania. With a wide array of wonderful resorts to choose from you will have many winter activities to choose from. Stay cozy by the fire, and enjoy a nice soak in your very own hot tub. There is no lack of privacy for you and your partner.
Paris, need I say more. Nothing is more romantic then a trip for two to Paris. You will have endless amounts of lavish wine, and the food is to die for. Spend a week stuffing your face, and seeing the sites. Nothing could be more enjoyable then a stroll around the Eiffel Tower. Plus, French is the language of love, and you will have a fun time saying cute little things to each other in French. Butchering the pronunciation of course.
A cruise is a really great chance to get away from it all. No matter where you go you will have endless possibilities on how to spend your time. Some cruises are specifically for couples, where as others you can enjoy with all types of people. The boat will normally dock in a few different spots giving you a chance to see many exciting towns, and shops. If you are going to do this opt in for a luxury suite so that you have some space for your alone time.
Top 5 Relationship Pet Peeves
Let’s face it, even when we are blinded by love, we still get royally pissed off when our partners do those little things that makes us crazy. No matter how much you get along, and love everything they say and do, there will come a time when you want to scream at the top of your lungs, ‘I hate that sweater, and I do not know why you continue to wear it’. I am talking about pet peeves, and we all have them. In relationships they can get pretty bad, and especially if you do not have the guts to say anything. If not, hopefully your partner will read this article, about the top five relationship pet peeves.
When a couple combines their lives they take both the good and bad. SO try to minimize the amount you do these things to make your relationship a bit smoother.
1. No nagging. Yes ladies we are all guilty of this. We feel the need to tell him to stop putting his cold, wet glass directly on our antique armour. However, once is enough. After that you just sound like his mother. Men, you are not in the clear yet. you do it too, but you do not believe you do, but think about it, how many times have you told your girlfriend to do the dishes, or make you a sandwich? The truth is, it gets tiring, and after a long day at the office, it is the last thing anyone wants to come home to. I find reversed psychology works great for this. I just say, ‘oh I wish I had remembered to do the dishes today’. Suddenly, tomorrow when you get home they will be done. But make sure you say thank-you, or next time they will be waiting for you.
2. Do not ever lye. I do not know anyone who enjoys being lied to, and especially the love of your life. It will only lead them to believe if you are lying about something so petty and small, what else are you lying about. Of course, if you are planning a surprise party, that is a different thing, but who cares if you ditched work early to get those shoes that were on sale. When he finds out the truth, you will be sorry. Not only is is cruel, but it manifests major trust issues for years to come.
3. No more drama in my life. Mary J. said it best. No one likes a drama queen, or king. Everyone can get whiny at times, but making a huge deal about everything in our life is stressful, and unnecessary. Ladies, you love to be the center of attention, but it can get old, and what happens when he stops caring. In relationships you need to make things about you bot, not just you. By both, I mean you and y our partner, not your cat Fluffy.
4. Undecided about everything. ‘What do you want for dinner?… ‘I dunno’… ‘I dunno’…’I dunno’. If this is your response to everything then you have issues. Just say it, ‘I want a Big Mac’. What are you afraid of. It shows you have a strong personality. You know what you want, and you know how to get it. This is a good trait to have as a woman, so bask in it. As a couple, you need to consult each other on things. If you disagree let them have it their way this time, and your way next time.
5. Never break a promise. You can to your dog, or gold fish, but not your partner. Just like lying, it will create trust issues down the road. If you are constantly saying you will do something and it never happens then your partner will become convinced that you are not true to your word on anything. It is annoying when someone promises they will pick up the dry-cleaning and then does not do it. Especially, if you have planned on wearing something that was in the load.
