Don’t Call Me. I’ll Call You.

Dating is quite the adventure and you never know how it’s going to go or end. Someone I dated last year resurfaced again this new year. Unfortunately for him I said no. Perhaps I was harsh but let me back up the story here.

We knew each other from our circle of friends. You know how it goes. A friend of a friend. We probably have always been attracted to each other for we use to flirt when we were around each other for some event but nothing. I heard through the grapevine he was interested and by the time we actually ended up on a date it was years later and he told me he always wanted to ask me out but I always had a boyfriend! He just threw it out there and asked when I would accompany him for dinner. Of course it didn’t hurt he threw beautiful girl in between the sentences. ha!

I figured we would have fun since we always had fun in each other’s company. He’s actually more of a reserved kind of guy but highly eccentric with humor I understood. The date began hilariously for he got my address mixed up so he was waiting down the block at a different place. I cannot stop laughing when I think of that. Just picture the two of us on our phones. I’m kind of walking on the sidewalk taking a glimpse down the street in the cold I might add. He slowly driving his car asking if i see him.  Quite memorable I have to say.

Dinner went really well and we went to a local hot spot for dessert which was a hop, skip and jump away from the restaurant. This is what I found out. When you date someone that is a mutual friend of a friend you both worry that the date details will go back to the friends which will in turn come back to each of us. I didn’t want that and have now decided to never date someone in the mutual circle since it makes it complicated. None of your friends wants to get involved if  there are bumps down the road because they don’t want to choose sides plus you never really know how much your friends really know.

I was surprised at how forward he was inviting me to his place to watch a movie and hang out afterwards. I did agree and gone was the reserved guy I once knew replaced with quite the confidence. After some dates I knew it wasn’t going to work out.There were things about him I obviously did not know about when you are just friends and I didn’t like them.

I am always amazed how two people can be dating each other and have a different perception of the situation. After only a few dates he was assuming that we were already seeing each other and that hey I was his girlfriend. I was not his girlfriend. I like to take my time getting to know someone and there was no conversation on the ‘exclusive dating’. You know what I’m talking about. He was just so much more invested in this than I was and I know he will never be a friend again because he can’t. Today I got a message asking if we should try again. Try what?! I feel pressured each time he contacts me for he keeps pushing the idea of us and there is no us. This has been going on every few months and I have chosen not to answer his calls anymore.