How To Have A Better Relationship Then Your Parents Did

So often we blame our parents for the way we turn out.  If they fought a lot then it seems we are destined to do the same thing with our spouses.  However, this is not the way you should be thinking of your relationship with your partner.  Instead you should be trying to overcome the predisposed acts of your parents.  You have been given a gift that they were not, and you are able to see exactly what you should not do.  Now of course, this only goes for the things you view as negative actions in your relationship, that have been a result of your parents actions.  The good things should be ignored.  Like they say, if it is not broken then do not fix it.

First, you should take your parents examples, as what not to do in your relationships.  If your parents did not set good examples in their own relationships, then you should not follow their leads.  Perhaps they did not know what they were imposing on you, but treat it as a guide to overcome the odds, and make a decision to try and refrain form acting the way they did.

Secondly, now that you have gotten rid of the bad influences, try and find a good role model to look up to in your relationship.  Perhaps you have noticed how your friends and his girlfriend never fight, and they always seem to communicate if things are not right.  Well you should talk to your friend and ask them how they do it so that you can try it with your girlfriend.  A lot of people will get jealous at the way other people handle their problems that they lose the advice from it.  Do not be envious of other couples, learn from them.

Third, you may want to think about getting some counselling.  If you know you are headed down the wrong path, you should ask for help.  Do not be afraid to admit when things are going wrong, and perhaps you could even ask your parents what they think went wrong with their relationship.  You can be sure that if they both point fingers at each other, they are both in the wrong.  You have a choice to either go to counselling alone, or try to get your partner to come as well.  If they will not go to counselling, then at least you  know that you tried.

Finally, you need to relax.  People get way to stressed out about relationship, when really they are supposed to fun, exciting, and enjoyable.  When you put too much pressure on each other, and freak out if things do not go as planned then you will have a hard time feeling satisfied about your relationship.  SO next time you are having problems, take a deep breath, and relax.